Wednesday, January 28, 2009

The Crossroads at 27 Weeks ~ Current Mood: Indecisive

So I'm 27 weeks pregnant with my second child and I'm definitely finding this pregnancy more challenging than the first. I remember, while I was pregnant with my first I was in bliss, happy with every moment.
It's been an experience to be pregnant again and have everything so different than the first....you learn new things about your body that you didn't know before.

With my first we wanted to do it all naturally, we had a midwife and planned to have her at home. For us this was not a new concept, my sisters had their children at home without complications, that was 9 home births I personally knew about, I has no worries that it would be just as easy for me. I went into labor at 6pm and everything was great! When it came time to push there was no hesitation for me, I was ready and determined to do this. For the next 4 hours I pushed, not only that but I was giving it my all, trying everything I needed to to make it happen. It was a surprise to my husband and I when all of my hard work went without success...in those 4 hours Syd had only moved 1 centimeter.
When they said that we needed to go to the hospital I had no problem with it, I really just wanted my daughter to be safe. In the end the decision was made that an emergency c-section was needed.
After all of this time, I don't regret any of it....I had an experience that you could never duplicate.

Now, I've come to a place where I must make a decision....I'm 27 weeks and I must decide whether I want to try a VBAC or have another c-section.
For both there are risks. With a VBAC the risks are to the baby and it's chance to live. With the C-Section, the risks are to me and my recovery.

I have to tell you, in all of the things I've ever decided on, this has to be the hardest.